A bittersweet change...

I just wanted to write a few thoughts down before I forgot them, so bear with me this is kind of jumbled together. 

On Sunday, I was released from my calling in the ward as the Beehive advisor, I  am now the compassionate service leader.  Yah, I thought sister's that had already raised their families were the ones that held that calling, not the sister's who have all their children at home with school, soccer, scouts, piano etc.  I was called into the bishop's office the week before and was extended the calling by the bishop.  I was shocked because I loved my calling in the young women, and I pretty much answered, well I was taught to never say no and a couple of weeks prior I had just given a lesson to the beehives on how we don't turn down a calling extended by the bishop or his counselors because it is a call from our Heavenly Father.   I struggled with accepted the calling, but I was really enjoying teaching the young women.  Now I am not a teacher but I felt I could teach the lessons that was in the manual.  I struggle with gospel doctrine lessons but these were lessons that had to do a litttle with life, gospel and everyday living.  I know I sound corny but I enjoyed teaching them.  The Beehives in the ward are amazing girls and they have taught me so much in the ten months I was in there and I will truly miss them. It's not like I am leaving the ward I just won't be with see them as often.

It is funny how the spirit works, like I said I struggled with the acceptance of the calling and I kind of felt sick because I didn't want to leave my calling but as soon as I was set apart I felt calm and not as sad as I was earlier that morning.  I am still very sad that I won't be there for the girls weekly but if they ever want to talk my door is always open, and having two boys the same age I will still be going to the activities.  It hit me today that I don't have to be to the church tonight for the activity.  I have not had a Wednesday night open for a long time, and yes it felt weird dropping the boys off and going back to get them, (well Ryan anyway, Clark stays and plays basketball with some of the young men and some of the brethern, he usually finds a ride home when dad doesn't go). 

I'm not sure how this calling is going to go so I hope that I will do a good job, I am not a person that likes to have to call and ask for help so I will have to grow in this.  I keep joking I was called to this position because I don't have compassion and I need to learn it.  Maybe it is true, we will see, like I said I hope I can do what is needed and what is expected.  Thank you for letting me write down my thoughts I hope haven't bored anybody to death.  I do know this is a calling from my Heavenly Father and I will do my best.  I do know that Heavenly Father knows what we can do and handle and if I ask for His help He will help me (even if I question it).  I do know that this gospel is true and I love my Savior very much.  I say this in the name of Jesus Christ Amen!